Sometimes I wonder if I am just completely out of touch with the world around me.
Last week I was in a couple of different stores, buying fabric for some projects that are currently (still) underway. As she was cutting my fabric, one of the clerks in a particular store asked me what I was making, and I replied that I was making clothing that would be given to some children in Bolivia, and explained what I was doing and why. Although she seemed to think this project was fascinating, she also told me that my choices were too "good" for charity sewing, and that I should save the "nice" fabric for my children and grandchildren and get something from the bargain bin instead. I am not talking about anything fancy here; she was cutting quilting cotton.
Apparently this continues to bother me, perhaps because I was simply too stunned to come up with a witty response at the time. Not that it would have changed her attitude, anyway. I have no objection to saving money. If there was something I would have bought for my family in the bargain bin, I would have bought it. But why on earth would I make, or even give, something to another human being, even a person who needs charity, something that I would not deem worthy of giving to my own family? The mere thought makes my blood boil. To say "this is too good" is to say that the person who receives it is not worthy, and who am I to judge?
Is this what we have come to? Are we the land of "I deserve better"? Or can we be a land that realizes that life on earth and everything in it is a gift, a gift to be shared?
Comments
9 responses to “A Question”
I love that you are making something beautiful to give away. That’s all.
Right on, Mardel. Your post reminded me of the house dresses to be made for very poor women at the upcoming Albuquerque Fashion Incubator bootcamp. Quoting Kathleen Fasanella: “I was not going to let our designers or stitchers off so easily because we must design and produce with integrity. Integrity means producing designs that are useful; not dumbed or watered down because the fine touches are “too expensive” or difficult to execute. Perhaps more than anyone, needy people deserve nice things.” Full post here: http://abqfashionincubator.com/wp/spring-2016-apparel-boot-camp-samples/
I’m encouraged that someone else is sewing/giving with integrity.
Wow. I am sure she didn’t mean it to come out sounding as badly as it did, but hearing that attitude would infuriate me, too. I made two dressy outfits not long ago and gave them to charity. One went to the Cinderella Project at the local high school, and one went to a thrift store that benefits a local charity. I gave me great delight to think that those two items might bring joy to someone while also benefitting a cause.
I think the clerk’s comment says a lot about her, and your desire to give away nicely-made things says a lot about you.
Because we have become a country of better thans…I’m sorry but I’m with you! What that woman said was appalling. Why would someone in need deserve less? I truly don’t understand what’s happening in America now and how we’ve lost our graciousness and civility or maybe we just never had it as evidenced by what you just experienced….*Sigh*
A lot of the satisfaction from sewing comes from admiring and touching the fabric…same with crochet, knitting, and so on. That’s a bonus on top of the pleasure of giving. Some people just don’t get it.
I, too , find the clerk’s comment appalling. When I shop for children whom our church or school is helping, I make a conscious decision to shop at the same stores where I buy my children’s clothes. A child who owns very few clothes needs items that will last and that can be handed down to younger siblings. And he or she deserves something nice for Christmas or whatever occasion!
I think that you are generous and gentle!
And I think about your work as well.
One of my nurses during the war 1991. was a refugee from Vukovar(eastern part of my country)-she lost her apartement and everything she had. It was only normal and right thing to do of me (and others) to give her some of our best things. I would be ashamed of myself otherwise
Dottoressa
I don’t think you need a witty response, just one that respectfully counters that elitist attitude with a simple statement of your own values.
A particularly bleak moment came when a board member of a community charity told me that when people gave a really good toy for a Christmas toy drive, the staff plucked it for their own children and replaced it with a cheap one.