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  • Thinking about Doctors

    After a busy day where nothing was accomplished but which seemed like an endless treadmill to nowhere, today is moving more calmly and slowly, and it seems that things are falling in place, at least in terms of my state of mind, although it is likely that nothing is still actually getting done, but then that depends on your definition of nothing. Most certainly the garden is not getting weeded, the laundry is not getting done, and I am not doing accounting work for the office, but these seemingly tangible things are ephemeral in their own way, ephemeral in that although they are concrete accomplishments, they are probably not lasting – they don’t really affect who we are or what we are, nor do they really have any bearing on the true accomplishments of life.

     

    But then, once again, perhaps I am living too much in my head.

     

    Yesterday brought the most recent issue of the NY Review and a package from Amazon. G immediately grumbled at a headline What’s Wrong with Doctors but then that is the kind of thing that always catches his attention, he takes doctor-bashing very seriously, although he will happily indulge in bashing other professions. I of course had to look at saw that it was a review of the new book by Jerome Groopman, How Doctor’s Think. I knew G’s sister was sending us a copy of the book, along with another one she thought G would be interested in reading, so I promptly settled down with it. I was eagerly awaiting the Groopman book as I have enjoyed reading the author’s essays in The New Yorker. The review was interesting. The book was even more interesting, and more balanced and interesting than I think I expected from the review. I need to check the review again, now that I have read the book.

     

    Indeed the book came yesterday as well. I started it at some point after dinner, probably around 9 PM and I finished it this morning. It has been a long time since I have just settled down to read a book without interruption and I truly needed to do this. It was a fabulously productive and calming experience. I stayed up late, after G went to bed, and I did briefly consider whether this was wise because I feared he would wake me early. He did. But after a cup of coffee I was simply ready to curl up in a sunny window and continue reading.

     

    It was a good book and well worth reading. It was not, of course, only about what is wrong with doctors, but also what is right with doctors, and sometimes also about what is wrong with patients. The book is much about how decisions are made, how medicine, or probably anything dealing with such complex organisms as humans and their lives, is not a simple science. There is no correct formula and many times even no right answer, although there way me an answer that is the best one for each individual patient. The book is continuing to affect how I think, and how I interact with doctors. This is an issue now as we deal with G’s current medical issues, but also with my own in the future. I think the book helps me to think about the process, and makes me try to think about how a doctor may be approaching the situation as well as how I as a patient or family member of a patient approach the doctor and how I pursue medical care.

     

    This subject — the idea of how we make decisions, how objective we can truly be, and how our upbringing, our training, our personalities, and our basic assumptions about life color our decisions even without us intending that they do so – is endlessly fascinating to me. It has come up several times in my life lately, not just concerning work and medical care. I think it is something that needs to be pursued further, and probably definitely needs to be a part of the education of those who care for others. But then, as Dr. Groopman says, medicine is, or at least should be, a calling more than it should be strictly a business. And that in the end is where we all have problems and issues with the health care delivery system. Each of us wants to be treated as an individual, to be listened to and cared for. But some part of us also wants rules and statistics, cures and guarantees. Our needs, our wishes, and our demands may not be compatible, and doctors and patients need to find a way to communicate and find their way through this morass together.

     

     

     

     

     

  • Chicken with Asparagus and Morels

     

    G found lovely asparagus at the Amish Market, imported from somewhere of course, but the ends were not hard and dried up the way one usually finds them in a grocery store, and they quite tender with very little that needed trimming away.

     

    Often, when I make this dish I cook the sauce until it is very rich and thick and just barely coats the vegetables and chicken. This time I cooked it less so that it was more like a thick broth in the bottom of the bowl, giving us an excuse to drop our popovers into the plate and soak up the wonderful liquid.

     

    Now that is springtime heaven.

     

    Chicken with Morels and Asparagus

     

    2 cups Chicken Stock

    ½ pound morels

    1 pound asparagus

    1 shallot, thinly sliced

    2 boneless skinless chicken breasts

    1 teaspoon salt

    1 teaspoon tarragon

    ½ teaspoon pepper

    ¼ cup heavy cream

    1 tablespoon olive oil

     

    Trim the ends off the asparagus and peel the larger stalks if tough, reserving the stems and peels. Trim any hard ends from the morels. Cut the remaining asparagus into 1 inch long sections and set aside.

     

    Preheat oven to 200 degrees.

     

    Place chicken stock, asparagus and morel trimmings, salt, and tarragon in a small saucepan and bring to a simmer. Simmer for at least 20 minutes but perhaps for up to 40 minutes, until flavorful and reduced in volume. Strain and set aside.

     

    Heat the olive oil in a large nonstick skillet. Brown the chicken breasts until golden on both sides. Remove chicken from skillet and keep warm in the oven. Add the asparagus pieces to the hot pan and sauté until crisp tender. Remove asparagus from pan and keep warm in oven with chicken.

     

    Add shallot to skillet and sauté, stirring constantly until just beginning to brown. Add mushrooms and the strained chicken stock. Bring to a boil, reduce heat, and simmer for 10 minutes. Add cream and return to a simmer. Return chicken breasts to skillet and simmer until sauce is thick and reduced to 1/4 to 1/2 cup.

     

    Add asparagus and any drippings to the skillet and simmer just until the asparagus is hot through. Serve immediately.

     

     

     

     

     

     

  • Spring Produce

    I know I’ve said this before but the hardest part of the culinary year is that time between New Years and the beginning of spring when there is little available in my region that is really appealing to eat. Oh there are exceptions, some fine fish in season, the mushroom man grows Shiitake and Oyster mushrooms locally, and they become the mainstays of our diet. But trips to the store are often dreary expeditions and the thought of preparing meals is not something that I always look forward to.

     

    This year’s upheavals in our personal lives have also contributed and I have not been finding great inspiration in the kitchen. Oh we eat well, usually simple grilled meat or fish and some kind of simple vegetable, but I have not eagerly made the transition to planning and cooking three meals a day, it has been many years since this was a part of my daily routine and starting up again with the post-winter dearth of appealing produce has been difficult.

     

    All that is about to change.

     

    The local farmer’s market begins on Sunday, the best Mother’s day treat I can imagine. And although I don’t expect a lot this early in the season, I know there will be fresh greens and mushrooms, fresh eggs and freshly killed chickens that I don’t have to drive an extra 20 miles to collect.

     

    But far more exciting events have been taking place as well. A day or two ago I received a call: “Are you still interested in ramps?” I was asked. And today I looked out the kitchen window to just in time to see a big basket of ramps and morels being carried up to our front door.

     

     


     

    For the first time in what seems like a lifetime, I spent the morning and early afternoon planning menus, cleaning produce and dreaming of all the things I can prepare. Dinners will be filled with ramps and morels for the next few days, although I am also planning on collecting more morels for the freezer. I read recently about freezing ramps as well, and that idea sounds intriguing. I haven’t tried it yet, but the idea of extending the ramp season even just a little bit it is tempting.

     


    Aren’t they lovely?

     

    I would have thought that the ramps would have been out for some time by now, and they might well have been, but I hadn’t seen any in the market or on my walk. I did see a few at Adams last week, but they looked old and wilted and even somewhat slimy. Usually the low areas, bogs, and fields along the streams feeding the Hudson River along the trail I normally walk are covered with ramps this time of year, but they are just beginning to appear. I can’t figure it out. The trees have leafed out right on schedule, their schedule must be daylight dependent, because many other things are late, I suppose those plants that depend on soil temperature to tell them when it is safe to emerge are the ones that are reluctant to spring forth this year.

     

    Well, we have ramps and morels now. And I am grateful. And I enjoyed cleaning the ramps and planning the menus, weighing out the morels for coming meals and I even put some aside to freeze. It was a wonderful day in the kitchen. A piece of pork loin was defrosted for dinner and I decided to try stuffing it. I spent a good bit of time poring over recipes, looking at what I had in the larder and deciding how to proceed, stuffed pork loin has not previously been a part of my repertoire, but I think it will be now. Most of the recipes I found called for too much bread and spice; I wanted the flavors of the morels and ramps to come through, so I stripped the ingredients down to the most basic elements. Somehow, it worked.



     

    Pork Loin Stuffed with Morels and Ramps

    Serves 4 to 6

     

    1/2 pound morels

    2 cups     stock    (I used capon stock because that was what I had on hand)

    2 tablespoons extra virgin olive oil

    1 tablespoon butter

    9 ramps finely chopped

    1 garlic clove, finely chopped

    1/4 cup fine dry breadcrumbs, I used Gillian’s gluten-free breadcrumbs

    2 pounds boneless pork loin roast

    Sea salt and freshly ground pepper to taste

     

    Preheat the oven to 375 degrees F.

     

    Reserve 6 mushrooms and place them in the veal stock. Set aside. Finely chop remaining mushrooms and place them in a bowl.

     

    In a large skillet, heat 1 ½ tablespoons of the olive oil over medium heat until hot but not smoking. Add the chopped ramps and garlic to the skillet and sauté until softened. Stir in butter and allow to melt. Add contents of skillet to bowl containing chopped mushrooms. Add bread crumbs and a generous dash of salt and pepper. Allow stuffing mixture to cool to room temperature.

     

    Make a hole through the length of the pork loin to use for the stuffing. Using a long knife pierce the loin through the center to the far side. Then turn the loin around and pierce again from the other end, aligning the cuts as well as possible. Then stretch the opening as much as possible to create a 1 ½ to 2 inch wide crevasse in the middle of the pork loin. Working from both ends, pack the stuffing into the opening, pushing toward the center. Rub the outside of the pork loin with olive oil and season with salt and pepper.

     

    Roast pork in the middle of the oven for 1 hour, or until a meat thermometer registers 160 degrees F. Transfer the pork to a cutting board and allow it to rest for about 10 minutes.

     

    While the pork is resting, place the roasting pan on top of the stove and add the stock with the reserved morel mushrooms and simmer, stirring occasionally for about 5 or 6 minutes.

     

    Slice pork loin and serve with sauce.

     

     

    This turned out really well and I will make it again. I think it would be quite amenable to other kinds of mushrooms and leeks or other onions. I might try it with garlic scapes in a few weeks.

  • I’ve Got Mail

    Looky Looky!  There was gold in my mailbox today!

    Magazines
    This bounty should easily fill supply me with enough sewing dreams to fill out the rest of this week. 

    Rather than grabbing them all and indulging in an evening spent wallowing in sewing ideas, I shall savour them slowly, one a day, to make them last, hopefully until I can squeeze in a little time with the sewing machines..

    Perhaps I should start with the Burda.  I have been reading  about the patterns in this issue already over on Stitcher’s Guild.

    But then, perhaps I will start with Inspirations.  There is a magazine I always treasure even though it has been far longer since I last indulged my passion for embroidery than it has been since the sewing machines were primed and running.

  • Tired

    It seems like my intellectual capacity has dried up to the point is almost hard and desiccated. I wonder if there is a chance of its continued survival.

     

    Mostly all I feel is tired of late. It is not really that I am working that much harder. I do the same things I did when my beloved was away at work all day. It is not the fact that he is recovering from surgery and unable to help that bothers me, it does not. I do no more than before. But why do I grow impatient with the constant repetition, the constant little requests, the reordering of my day again and again? I am not frazzled, swamped or otherwise overwhelmed. I enjoy the time we spend together. And yet there seems to be no time for my own pursuits. I have sewn nothing. I steal small snatches of time to pursue a little knitting, but not enough time and little progress is made. I haven’t read a thing. The reading materials pile up higher and higher. Even finding time for exercise seems difficult. I get started and am interrupted; the time steals away and the impetus is gone. When I find a few moments to spare I desire nothing more than sleep, although even my attempts at sneaking off for naps are interrupted. I should not need them. I am not getting that much less sleep than usual; naps should be unnecessary.

     

    What is the source of this ennui?

     

    Last night I was up for a few hours in the middle of the night and I spent the time reading. I picked up The Omnivore’s Dilemma, which I had abandoned a month ago, when life got crazy all of a sudden, and I truly enjoyed reading it. Lost in the words on the page I blissfully passed a couple of hours until I realized that I was dead tired and was having trouble keeping my eyes open and my head upright. I went to sleep immediately after Michael Pollan had killed his boar and was disgusted with the necessary process of slaughter. You would think this image would keep me awake, but it did not. I had pleasant dreams of the rituals of food, and sharing memories with people one cares about. I woke up refreshed many hours later.

     

    And why, during another day, with endless tasks stretching out before me do I feel so exhausted again, unable to read, unable to knit, unable to sew, wanting only to curl up in a little ball and sleep, sleep, sleep.

  • Patrones Updaate, answers and comments

    To answer a few questions:

    Shannon and Christina write that Around the World in NYC carries Patrones and they are willing to ship.  I love Around the World and stop in there whenever I get a chance to walk anywhere near that neighborhood.  They were my source for several of the Patrones I got before the subscription.  They do ship and they are accommodating.  But competition for these magazines in NYC can be steep and you have to call while they have the books in stock, or just before they arrive.  I have had success with Around the World and Kinokinuya (for Mrs. Stylebook) with calling just before they expected a shipment to come in and pre-ordering a book.    But one has to keep up with publishing schedules and shipping schedules to pull this off. The standard issues of Patrones do not stay on the shelves long (if you are looking for large size editions, or children’s issues you will have more luck).  Neither store will sell a subscription for the magazines.   I have decided that I am just too disorganized or too lazy to go to the trouble if I can get the book shipped directly to me.  I have loved every issue of Patrones I have seen.

    Now some issues are children’s issues, I think about 4 issues a year, but I am not certain.  In the first 4 months I have gotten 1 children’s issue.  That is OK because I do occasionally sew for nieces, nephews, friends children, and grandchild, although I don’t generally write about it (except for some grandbabby sewing) because It is not as interesting to me as making adult garments for myself.  I know there will also be a couple of  large size issues but that is not a problem because I am not a small person to begin with, although the large sizes are often larger than I want, and I can alter anything I like to fit.  So we will see how it goes, if there are too many children’s issues, I may not renew.  Let’s see.

    As to price, the price of 288.4 Euros currently translates to $393.72 which is less than the Amazon subscription price of  $425.  The only rough part is figuring out how to fill out the Spanish subscription form, but there translators on the web to help you with that.  When I purchased my subscription the Euro was cheaper against the dollar and DH paid 321.89 for the subscription, so I can see how it would be beneficial to pay attention to exchange rates and subscribe accordingly.

    There are twelve issues.  At $322.00 for a subscription that works out to $26.8 per issue, not cheap but not that far off what I was paying on e-bay for the fast shipping from Germany.  AT the current exchange rate it is more expensive at 32.83 per issue.  Of course, if you just throw away the children’s issues it would be considerably more expensive.  Then you would have to decide if you got enough usable patterns out of each issue that it worked out in terms of cost per pattern. AT the moment, for my use, I would say I get more than $27 worth of patterns out of each issue, but I may have to reconsider if the dollar keeps falling against the Euro.  Luckily I have a few months, and lots of sewing time, before that decision will come up.

  • Iris Made Me Do It.

    Well, that is not exactly true, but she did help.

    Tealboot2

    You see, I had been eying these teal boots by Delman for several months over at Zappos .  They had been in my "favorites" since December I think, and I would periodically look at them and drool.  But I realize that teal boots are not a necessity, and I have many pairs of boots.  In fact I was just complaining that I have more boots than will fit into the allotted storage space and I was contemplating liberating a few pairs. I am not sure that will really happen, especially considering that I just purchased these boots and absolutely love them.

    After looking at all Iris Apfel’s beautiful books all weekend, and then staring longingly at these teal beauties, and noticing that they were STILL available in my size, I bought them.

    They fit perfectly, they are the exact shade of teal as several things in my wardrobe, and they coordinate perfectly with a favorite skirt that has proven very difficult to match and pair with other garments.

    Delmanflats
    As I placed the boots lovingly in a temporary spot in my shoe closet while I ponder the issue of expanded boot storage, I noticed that the oldest pair of shoes is also probably** a pair of Delmans that I thought extremely frivolous at the time, but which has proven to be a long term standard and favorite.

    These suede flats were purchased, I believe around 1985, give or take a year. and have been worn steadily, every season since.

    ***  There are actually three pairs of shoes from the mid-eighties still floating around in the wardrobe, but I believe these are the oldest.  These date just before the time my feet decided to suddenly grow from a 7 1/2 to an 8 1/2, much to my shoe-collecting chagrin, or there would be more survivors.  If my feet hadn’t grown I would still have the gorgeous royal blue suede and lizard pumps I wore on my wedding day.  My feet might have been in a transitional stage at the time, because I bought an 8, or they might have only come in even sizes,  because I am pretty consistently a true 8 1/2 in Delman and Ferragamo, my benchmarks for well-made, well-fitting, comfortable shoes.

  • Patrones Subscriptions

    A couple of people have asked about subscribing to Patrones.   I don’t know of any subscription service that sends Patrones to the US, although there may be one available.

    I got my subscription directly from Patrones by going to the Patrones Website  and clicking on the button called Subscripcion.

    Everything is in Spanish, but I think it can be figured out.  Basically, if you are not in Europe you need the bottom choice "Resto países, correo certificado vía aérea 288,40 €." which basically means airmail to the rest of the world.  There seems to be no option bo subscribe by slow boat, and you will note that the rest of the world pays far more than the Europeans do, based on the exhorbitant cost of the airmail. The service has been quite prompt, except for April, my first three issues arrived right away, February and March were here by the 3rd day of each month.

    My subscription was a gift from my DH.  But I will renew it next year.  Although I might have spent less ordering issues on ebay and having them shipped express from Germany, it wasn’t that much less, and I never opted for slow boat delivery as I am far too impatient. Besides there was all the trouble of looking for issues and dealing with ebay. 

    If anyone knows of another way, please let me know.

  • Does fate hinge on the lowly bee?

    In yesterday’s New York Times there was an article about honeybees. It has preyed on my mind. Did you know massive numbers of honeybees have died off or disappeared?

     

    What a disaster. How many plants are pollinated by bees? How much of civilization and our ability to feed ourselves is dependent on the activities of the lowly bee. Do we think of this? Not really I suspect. Bees are something we swat at when they disturb our picnic, or run from because we are allergic to the sting.

     

    Spring is just starting; the bees aren’t really out here. But what would happen if there were no more bees? I read the stories, the theories, have the bees eaten something that has caused them to die off? This strikes me as interesting as I read about changing animal’s metabolisms or feeding them antibiotics en masse so that we can raise them on diets that their bodies weren’t built to handle just because it is convenient to big business. The diets of bees have changed. Beekeepers feed bees food based on the same processed corn that we subject ourselves too. Many natural foods have been so altered or eliminated by corporate agriculture that the bee’s normal food is not available. We are what we eat. What we eat may not only determine how we live, but how we die.

     

    Or is it other things. Environmental changes? Corporate Farming? The arrogance of humanity?

     

    Here we are trying to make ourselves more green, trying to save ourselves from the pending upheaval caused by global warming, and perhaps a greater damage has already been done without our even paying attention.

     

    I have been thinking about Thomas Friedman’s article in the New York Times on April 15, which I am still pondering, and thinking about how I can be more environmentally conscious and take up a smaller footprint. I am thinking about what we eat and what goes into what we eat. I do not believe eating local will solve the world’s problems. I believe we need a global economy even for food, but there are many things that are done better on a local scale. I don’t believe people are going to stop using energy. I believe we need to find new ways to create it, ways less harmful to the earth. But if the bees die, will there be enough time. Or is our fate sealed.

     

    In many ways, my generation and the one before me, the post-war generations have all been reared on experimental technologies, messing with food and chemicals as such a normal part of our lives we really have no idea if we are better off, or worse.

     

    It may not matter. Like Goliath we may be heading for a fall from a source we never even considered worthy of thought.

  • SWAP

    Well SWAP is officially over and the submissions are absolutely fabulous.  Instead of sewing I have been drooling over the 31 collections and kicking myself for not participating. 

    I have never done a SWAP.  I have trouble conceiving of doing a SWAP.  As those who know me well will attest, I have trouble sticking to even the simplest plan without being lured into something else.  Chaos should truly have been my middle name.

    That does not mean that I do not greatly admire all those people (they were women, but there might have been a man) who have created coordinated wardrobes of 11 garments.  I am stunned, actually stunned at the variety and quality of the submissions.  Check them out here .  They are positively drool-worthy. Everyone who participated is a winner here just in terms of what they have achieved. 

    As a member of Artisan’s Square, I am entitled to a vote, and I have been seriously contemplating the choices.  With 31 submissions, it is hard to choose, and I am trying mightly not to judge arbitrarily.    I have spent time listing what I believe to be the important points, carefully analyzing the photos, and attempting to look at the choices fairly and clearly.  I have narrowed them down to 7 in my mind.  After much deliberation, II have eliminated one and decided on my first and second place picks, but the remaining 4 all vie for third place.  I have yet to discern how I can choose between them.  In the end I will probably have to make some completely arbitrary decision about how well I think they succeeded in creating a wardrobe that meets their stated needs.  A lot of this decision will depend on how the intention of each swap was described and then how the final results are presented, and whether the collection works as a whole to meet the stated goals. 

    If you have a better idea let me know.  Perhaps another night’s sleep will help.