Author: 459856pwpadmin

  • The May Garden in Detail

    I've had several blog posts rooting around somewhere in the back of my brain, but they haven't yet coalesced into anything coherent so I have nothing to fall back on but another garden post, heavy on photos and light on words.  Hopefully that, the energy deficit, is turning around following a flutter ablation last Friday, but, let's not count our chickens and all that stuff.

    Mayday1

    The garden, despite the empty spaces, has been a gift. The Siberian iris, Caesar's Brother, is finally coming into its own.  This is its third summer.  Last year I had blossoms but they were small and spindly.  This year the combination of the iris and the geraniums is everything I hoped it would be.

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    One of the irises, in detail.

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    The peonies have started blooming.  This was the first to open.

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    Here it is again, becoming a bit blowsy but more blossoms are opening all around it.  This time with the new bearded iris behind it.  I found this bulb in a discount basket somewhat late for planting irises las summer, and stuck the three bulbs in the ground.  Only one came up, not bad for $1 though.  This is its first season of bloom.

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    The little apricot ground cover roses are also starting to bloom.  They survived a year in their nursery pots; it didn't seem to dampen their enthusiasm, so I dutifully snapped pictures the first blossoms.

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    And the blackberry vines are slowly filling with blossoms and promises of fruit to come.

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    The shady azalea garden in the back is also coming into bloom.  The pink shrubs in the back were in full bloom about two weeks ago and are now fading. The white are in their glory now, and the pretty large pale pink blossoms only slightly behind (below).

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    The fringe tree is also filled with blossoms.  In fact everywhere I look something is blooming.  Oh, I know this exuberance will not last, but at the moment it is all glorious.

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  • Cross-Dressing

    Silliness. Yes.  I love stupid cross-references and playing with words.  I don't feel particularly embarrassed or shy about my love of such silliness, even if my references and jokes make sense to no one but myself.  In fact, it may be the pure ridiculousness that makes me happy.

    CrossDressing

    More than two, no three, weeks after my episode of silliness, I remain giddy with glee at the memory.  If I am thrilled with the sewing, even simple sewing, perhaps I should blog. I may be slow, but that is no reason to be apologetic or to hold back.

     

    But what was all this bubbling silliness about?  I made a small, baby-doll sized, dress.  Except it was for a cross. And yes, once I thought about dresses for crosses, inappropriate puns did come to mind. I have no regrets.

     

    All that needs saying is that something was damaged and needed replacing.  And so it was done.  Finding the right shade of fabric took more time than the making; I couldn't find quite the right purple locally and so something had to be ordered.  That something ended up being slightly too stiff for the size of the cross and the tightness of the necessary curves, but I managed.

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    A pattern was drafted and everything was cut out.  I naively thought I could do the whole thing in the roughly two and a half to three hours between the early church service and the end of the second.  Ha!  And then I discovered that half the electric circuits in my sewing studio had blown out in a recent storm.  I couldn't get them all to come back on, so there was much running around and clucking, much moving of things hither and thither  – even then I was sure I could do it.  I almost succeeded.

     

    But, as I was heading over to the pressing table, I held the almost-finished cover up and decided it looked like a party dress.  And I burst into delicious giggles.  I couldn't stop dancing around my studio like a fool thinking about tiny little dresses for crosses.  Absurd, no?  And then, because I was thinking of dresses, and because I wasn't quite sure how the hem should lie to best accommodate the stand at the base of the cross, I decided that a fitting session was absolutely necessary.  

    TryOn

    So I ran over to the church to meet my client, my client the cross, for a little fitting. What party dress does not need a proper fitting after all?  The cross might not have cared.  But apparently I cared deeply.  Nothing is pressed in the photo above but at least the hem is pinned, and it did not end up being in the position I would have placed it without the fitting.  Isn't he/she/it/they going to be lovely?  Is lovely even a word that applies to crosses?

     

    None of this was complicated sewing, or complicated pattern drafting for that matter.  And I've made another since, in another color, for Holy Week.  The second version was in a more appropriate fabric.  Not surprisingly, I forgot to take photos.  

     

    Getting back to sewing, no getting back to blogging about sewing:  blogging, about anything really, has too many moving parts in need of coordination.  And yet today the whole process makes me happy.  This is what I always wanted a blog to be, back when I started these blogs, when I naively knew nothing about blogging.  I don't care about marketing, or branding, or even expectation.  I think all I cared about, all I still care about, is the joy in the making, in the seeing, in the living, in the entire process of saying "I made this", or, perhaps more importantly, "I am part of this process called life".  Blogging has been about the sharing, but also the recording, not as acclamation or acknowledgement, but because of the way that writing brings my thoughts full circle.  I don't really know what I think until I write it down.  

     

    Apparently I cannot help myself.  Maybe if I want to resume blogging I have to stop worrying about what I should be blogging about, and just remember joy, or sadness, the gains and the losses, and the feelings that come with it all.  In the seventeen some-odd years since I started this blog, the blogging world has become more polished, more professional, more focused, has become something I actually never actually wanted.  I have tried to evolve, but it has been a struggle.  

     

    All I wanted was a place to explore my own distractions: successes, failures, and silly puns included. All I wanted was a place to keep it all together.  All I want is place that is not a piece of paper that I am more than likely to toss in some future clutter-focused state of pique. 

     

    Perhaps tiny purple party dresses for crosses have something to teach us after all.

  • In Your Easter Bonnet

    There has been some small progress on the garden front.  Very little of the effort was mine and yet I am as proud and happy as can be.  The garden is spruced up for spring at least as spruced as it is likely to get this spring.

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    I feel like the yard has donned its Easter dress.

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    Saturday morning I gathered up all the little plants that have been languishing in the shady corners, since the spring of 2021 when I had ordered several dozen small plants intending to make headway on the front gardens.  There were a few bigger plants as well.  Some of them had rooted through their pots into the soil and so a little bit of digging was involved.  My labor conisisted of uprooting them all and placing them wherever I had originally planned to plant them.  

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    A crew came and planted them Saturday afternoon.  Monday morning they came back and mulched. Above is a mix of old and new and yet undone.  Gardens are mostly like that.

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    The remnants of winter pansies and drift roses.

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    Some tiny green flecks of alchemilla mollis between the peonies and the grass (above right). Another peony, which had been sheltering behind the garage, in a shady but protected spot, was also transplanted, far right in front of the hydrangeas.  It has leafed out further than the ones I planted in this same bed last spring, where it is sunnier but more exposed.  Some of my neighbors' peonies have buds. I do not, yet.

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    This is the older bed, between my driveway and the neighbor on the East.  A few more nepeta plants were added.

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    I keep singing "Easter Parade" when I am in the yard.

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    There is still a lot to design and plant, and I have come to terms with the idea that I am not going to do it.  I am already working with a designer but it will likely be at least fall before further progress is made.  I don't intend to do much but clean out the overgrown vegetable garden in the back.  It is included in this photo because I have some perverse inclination to acknowledge and celebrate the failures and imperfections as well as the successes. 

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    I am all for celebrating beauty and joy.  But beauty and joy are not everything.  Life is tough. Things break. And yet we still bloom and grow.

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    That previous sentence sounds like some sappy theme from The Sound of Music, or a book blurb.  

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    There remain more empty spaces than plants, but I am ok with that.  I have already given myself permission not to fret, and not to plant this year.  In fact that is more like an order — "do not plant".  Wait and see. Oh, I know there will be exceptions.  I will pick up something here or there and be unable to risk the possibility of putting it in the ground.

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    There is no rush and there is also no such thing as an instant garden.

  • Sloper beginnings

    A little late here despite my best intentions.

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    Beginnings of a sloper.  This is what scoliosis does, rendered in two dimensions.  And I am extremely grateful for it.  The alternatives, in my case, had I never had surgery, would be far far worse.

     

    When Liana was here at the beginning of March, we made a cling wrap sloper.  We were both a little out of practice, and I could have purchased something more clingy, but it was a good start. I had every intention of transferring the fragile plastic to paper and then making a muslin immediately.

     

    Life took a different turn.

     

    This is not a surprise.  I made one of these before, when I lived in New York, and it was phenomenally helpful with fitting and pattern alterations.  I knew already that I was not symmetrical.  And yet looking at a flat paper version of oneself is somehow still disconcerting.  None of us are perfectly symmetrical.  None of us are without flaws.  None of us is truly comfortable seeing any part of ourselves as we truly are.

     

    A certain balance will be achieved when I trace off the fronts.  This means that if the left back is smaller than the right back, the left front will be larger than the right front.  As I said I already knew this.  I haven't cut pattern pieces double, or even on a fold, for years.  In terms of ready to wear, it explains why separates, and simple, loosely fitting garments are easier for me to wear, than more fitted options.

    Here is another picture.

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    You can see not only the difference in size, but also the difference in torque or angle.  I find this rather exciting and I am looking forward to the process of exploration and discovery that is about to begin.

     

    Alas April and May are phenomenally busy and I have some non-clothing sewing that must be done in the immediate future.  Although I am pretty desperate for summer clothing, I am also not interested in rushing.  I am hoping that as I can get to sewing, I can also start with simple, less fitted garments, which may be my preference once the heat and humidity arrive, and expand my options as time and energy allow. Whereas my younger self would have found this frustrating, now I am patiently content.  Time and energy may not be in great supply at the moment, but that too will change, and anticipation is, in and of itself a gift.

     

     

  • Here and There; Everywhere and Nowhere; Does it Matter?

    I was at Big Ears this past weekend.  I am home. Technically I suppose I was always home as Big Ears takes place in Knoxville.  And yet the festival offers an opportunity to check out of the routine of normal life and to step into something different, perhaps unknown, definitely unexpected.  I suppose that is one of the things I love about this experience.  I am not convinced that I am the best judge of what is new, or "avant-garde" or even good, but what I love about this festival is the opportunity to step through the looking glass in a way, to just go, to listen, perhaps to be surprised by joy, to let your world be filled with something perhaps unexpected.

     

    Anyway, I wasn't really planning on writing about Big Ears in this post. I may do so in some future post.  I am still processing everything in my head and heart.  I've written about my experiences at Big Ears following every festival, and it seems to almost foreign to admit that I may or may not do so.  And yet, look at my record this year. There has been much I intended to say that I have not.  Despite that, I find myself oddly content.

     

    Life is not about the writing, after all.  To make one's mark, to write, to post to social media, the attempt to claim one's presence and worth — this is all too human, this striving.  But life is lived with or without public acknowledgement.  One has walked x number of miles whether or not one has worn a smart watch and recorded the same.  This year, despite multiple, broadly expansive to-do lists, I have mostly not done, and have been content, happy even.  I can say that honestly even though in some ways it has not been the best year, certainly not the year I was hoping for.  

     

    But happiness, and whether or not life is good, actually has nothing to do with the things that happen all around one.  It is an internal thing, perhaps a state of acceptance.  Many good things have come this year.  There has been time with family and friends, although perhaps not as much time with family as I might have hoped.  I have traveled, and read, and played with textiles.  I have been lost in thought slowly drinking a cup of coffee or tea.  Mostly I have been in the moment, even when those moments were in the hospital because my heart went back into flutter, and the one thing I did not want — more time in hospitals — came to pass despite my protestations.  I am ok now.  I remain content even though I have been trying for a week to open my new bottle of eye drops and failing with every attempt.  I am happy even though I am behind on more things than I can count.  I am happy and healthy, at least in so far as any almost-64-year-old can claim to be. I can choose to be happy, to celebrate the good that has come, or I can hold onto bitterness over that which has not come.  I think I choose the former. 

     

    I may yet write about music and the discoveries of Big Ears.  I may yet write about that trip to the literary festival back in January.  I may not.  I may do less, but I hope to enjoy it more: to savor a properly made coffee Americano: to exist in the moment of idle chatter with a friend;  to spend hours ripping and re-knitting without regret or recrimination, to stay up in the wee hours listening to music, or reading a bodice-ripper.  I know I will write, here even.  I have not given up on seeing myself as a person who maintains this blog, I merely accept that the path is full of curves and I do not yet know, or even need to know, the destination.

     

    At the moment all I have are questions and vague thoughts.  I am not certain that anything about our sense of timelines and obligation has much to do with the ebb and flow of life, but that it is rather something we impose on ourselves and each other.  I wonder if a good life is not so much about what one has accomplished but rather about those fleeting moments of just being present. I wonder if perhaps I like music more than I like people.  Music never breaks one's heart.  Only people do that.  Music never disappoints; mostly our disappointments are caused by our own self-imposed expectations.  And yet a life lived without the risk of a broken heart is a life not lived at all.  And how can there be music, or art, or even joy and love without pain and heartbreak? What makes a good life is not all the things that have been made and done, it is in the breaking and rejoining, in the birth and death and yes, rebirth.

     

    It is not that I love music, or art, more than people.  I love.  We are a communal species. And yet that power of creation comes from the inward breath. The power of happiness exists only within us, it is not a gift that is given to us depending on circumstances, it is a gift we give the world despite circumstances. 

  • Minor Burps Perhaps, But Still Here.

    The world has not stopped, although at any given moment parts of it seem traumatized by events somewhere or another.  I have not stopped venturing into the sewing studio either, even though at the moment there is not a great deal to show for my time or efforts.  The studio is actually my sanctuary, a place where care, fear, and stress disappear. It is not that I have quite overcome the many-directional pulls of distraction, but in the end, it is not distraction that grounds us or provides meaning in life.

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    I did manage to get almost all the fabric unpacked, put on shelves, and catalogued.  This is the first time in many years that everything is easily visible.   I have to admit to being only "almost" unpacked because after going through all this, I found three banker's boxes of fabric in the basement, boxes which were never supposed to be in the basement in the first place.  Alas there is no space on the shelves to unpack them so they remain in fabric purgatory, out of sight and out of mind until I at least sew something and clear some space.

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    There were other aspects of sorting and cleaning up going on — beginning steps of creating a system, although no system is finished until it holds up to actual work.  There is always a disconnect between the imaginary world of design and the real world. I am certain that any attempts at organization will go through upheavals and revisions, but for the first time really, I am beginning to see and feel a place, a haven really, to come into and let the work itself take center stage.

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    It feels good to be in the studio.  The pressing table has seen more use as a photography station than for pressing of late.  I expect it will continue to do double duty, at least until the yarn has been sorted and catalogued.  At least the yarn has at least been corralled into a single space and I have catalogued and sorted enough for any short-term projects.  I admit, it felt good to be taking photos, to put my hands on every piece of fabric, to satisfy my organizational demons.  Conflicting emotions arose, every piece feeding both creative instincts and angst over the too-muchness of it all. The best I can do is admit that there was a period when George was ill and I was not sewing, a time when I consoled myself by buying fabric.  I cannot say it was cheaper than therapy, I can say that what you see on the walls serves as my retirement fund, my wall of dreams, and a place of great calm.  There is no point in fretting over the choices of the past, only in accepting that we each do the best we can.  Whatever choices we make or fail to make, they are intimately woven into the fabric of who we are.

    Mending

    There has been a little mending here and there and more than a few alterations.  Mostly no photographs were taken of same, and that is OK.  I have attempted some embroidery as well, although for the most part my fingers are out of practice and not quite as adept as once they were, partially due simply to inactivity, partly due to repercussions following last year's chemo-induced neuropathy.  I will move forward, regrets cast aside. Hopefully skills will improve. There is no point in life in dwelling on what I once could do, even as I realize that I should have celebrated more and fretted less. 

    Appletons

    I did buy a shade card set for Appleton wools, necessary for a crewel-embroidery project that is mostly still in the planning stages.  Shown here on a piece of wool boucle that had been washed and partially felted.  If anything I love the colors more after felting than in their original state.  I was all gung-ho with excitement when I conceived of this project, but tiredness, arrhythmias, and life slowed me down, and it got put aside for a few weeks.  Not to be concerned, there are several projects on my cutting table now and I want to work on all of them.  Something will come of it all, even if that something is not quite what was initially envisioned. 

     

    This is the year for play after all.  It is not the results that are important but the process of exploration, of doing, of experimentation.  Who knows where it will all lead, and ultimately it is not really important if it leads anywhere at all. 

     

  • Settling In, Again.

    This was not intentional, this precipitous dive off the blogging map.  It just happened.  One day I was filled with ideas and the next those ideas had taken a sharp left turn.  All good, in many ways.  What actually happened is that I needed to settle in.

     

    It has been roughly two years since I moved back into this house and the construction was finished.  They were not, personally my favorite two years, but the house was done and I was safely ensconced.  The basic tools and artifacts of living were unpacked, but large parts of the studio remained boxed up and chaotic.  This year I have given myself permission to play, to discover, to experiment, and, if that is what I wish, to simply sit in a pile of fiber and dream.  There are no goals. There is but one rule: follow your heart. Do something, anything, without fear, without worry, without expectation.

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    Part of that process has involved a return to unpacking.  All the boxes of fabric have been unpacked, sorted, photographed, cataloged and put on the shelves.  I am now going through the same process with yarns and embroidery/needlework materials, although there is not quite as much a rush on that front. Even this one step has given me access, ideas, and the desire to hide out in my bright space and play.

     

    At the same time I sent all the large rugs in the house out to be cleaned.  The house has been colder without the insulation value of the rugs, so I spent some time working on my alpaca blanket.  The visual change also prompted a reevaluation of furniture layouts and how I am using the house, so there has been some moving of furniture, both upstairs and down.  

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    The small side tables that were upstairs were not working next to the library sofa, so they got moved to the front hall, where I felt something more was needed.  I didn't know what until I happened to place those tables beside the front door.  The small bowl shown has moved, and I found two green glass vases which I can fill with flowers.  Now my entry is beginning to bring joy.

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    But you know how it is, move one thing, and then suddenly the entire room needs to be transformed.  After moving the tables, I decided that the armchair in the library needed to be swapped with the reclining chair that had been in the master bedroom, where it was neglected.  It works much better in the library, and gives the room a more modern vibe.  There are no plans to get a side table for that spot at the moment, other than the little bubu 1er stool that is currently there.  I have ordered a reading lamp, but it is backordered for a couple of months.

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    Going with the modern vibe, the two glass Eileen Gray side tables, which were not working in their previous locations, were moved up to the library to flank the sofa.  Then the lights, which were the first lamps I ever purchased, shortly after I moved in with George, about forty years ago now, did not work with the new tables.  Well, technically they didn't work before the tables were swapped either.    So. I bought new lamps that had better-directed task lighting if I wish to read or knit.   Above you see both lamps, the new and the old.

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    I really like this new arrangement.  The lights and the tables disappear somewhat against the wall of books, yet they are both attractive and functional.  I almost want to have people over for drinks in the library. Except that is not why it was rearranged.  A home is about what works for the life of the people who live there, not about what it says to others.  For me, a certain amount of visual harmony is paramount.  It must work but it must also bring me aesthetic pleasure.  Now I have a library/office/television room that does all that.  It will bring even more joy when the rug returns and my ankles aren't always cold.

     

     

  • Vacation

     

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    At times, over the past 23 months it seems that all I wanted was to get away, to go someplace, any place.  Why was it then, when a long-scheduled vacation finally loomed, I had decidedly mixed feelings?

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    Anyway, I went.  I had a great time.  It was not always smooth, but then, what in life is?  I admit that as much of my trepidation about traveling, about traveling alone, was that in the past, the world of 24 months ago, I was finding that I did not really relish solo travel all that much.  But perhaps I just needed to slough something off, something that I might not have sloughed off otherwise.  Perhaps I needed to realize that I am only as alone as I chose to be, and that solo travel does not imply loneliness.

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    I can admit that my initial reaction to Key West was mixed.  I arrived near dusk.  I ventured out to the seaport and along Duval Street and I was struggling with crowds and noise.  This was in sharp opposition to my reaction to airports and travel itself.  Why was it that Duval Street made me pull inward, whereas I can drift through a crowded airport as if in a bubble?

     

    Something I noticed before, before I stopped traveling, is that I find the travel itself quite calming.   I am perhaps neurotically organized.  I am always packed and ready at least a day before.  I can feel at loose ends waiting.  But at the same time this helps with my feelings of calmness.  I've been stranded in airports due to cancelled planes and I tend to be calm and bemused.  There is something about going to an airport, about planning travel, that allows me to just let go of the idea that I have any say in controlling events in the world,  that allows me to make myself into an island of calm.  Home may be my kingdom, and I want control.  In the world, it is easier to slough all that off.  This seems like phenomenal growth.  Would that I could maintain it in my daily life.

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    When I arrive however, that bubble seems to burst; perhaps it is just the yearning that takes over, the idea of vacation, the idea of escape, of adventure, of fulfillment.  That first evening in an unfamiliar place, I was nervous in crowds but also nervous on a street that felt too quiet in contrast.  Of course this stems from years of training, compounded by now years of isolation and this crazy- making hyperbolic world we live in, a world that sometimes seems determined to feed on fear, on making us fear one another.  That first night on Duval Street was like the meeting of two opposing seas, leaving me in emotional turmoil.  I had left the safety of home, but hadn't yet found my vacation self.  I felt like Dorothy landing in Oz.  I think there is always that moment of transition, a moment when pent up expectation spills over; how we experience it may vary, but it too is part of the beauty of vacation.

    Shrimp Bisque

    I found a happy corner to settle down in.  I had soup, and shrimp, and a vantage point for people watching.  That airport calm descended once again.  I walked back to my hotel in the cooler night air.  I wasn't yet sure what I thought of this place; at first it seemed too casual, too loud, too "tourista".  But that was mostly me,  my own unsettledness. It takes me a little while to shift gears sometimes, even shifting into gears that have been getting more frequent use as I grow older.

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    The second morning I found a great breakfast and coffee spot, a place I stopped most mornings.  I wandered around old town.  I admired the neighborhoods, the bars, the stores, the music, the artists.  I loved the fact that chickens, and especially roosters, wandered around everywhere.  This seemed a metaphor for something, perhaps just the idea of not rushing.  I watched a gecko while I drank a cup of strong Cuban coffee. I hadn't put words to that something at that point; I am not sure I have yet.  But I too began to unwind, to enjoy this place, the ambiance, the casual vibe.  I began to let go of my own expectations.

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    That did not come as easily as it sounds writing the words.  It is so easy to write, "I let go". But nothing is really that simple, is it?  I found my joys and my disappointments came in waves, but overall the good quickly outnumbered the bad, and mostly came when least expected, lost in a moment, often of mundanity.

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    I retreated during the heat of the day to my shady porch, or perhaps to the big window with the easy chair and my knitting.  I am still not a creature of the hotter climes.  I love the angled sunshine of winter light.  I burn in the hotter sun, get sun poisoning and headaches, but that doesn't mean I don't love the easy going flow of tropical and sub-tropical climes.  And yet here I was, happy and content, enjoying shade and warm breezes, the languor of the siesta.

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    I was went to Key West for an event, a literary festival, but I will write about that in another post.  I attended.  I missed some things.  I walked a lot, more than I had in a long time, since before my cancer treatment, only 3 to 5 miles a day, but it was a start.  I hope to keep walking now that I am home in cooler weather.  I needed the boost, the interruption to my state of inertia.

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    What I found, and what I often forget, is that for me the best part of vacation is not seeing the sights, or doing the things that everyone tells me I must do, but in the wandering around, in talking to people.  In just sitting back and being in a place.   I went to the Hemingway museum.  I did not go on the water.   Yes I want to see and do but I also just want to unwind and be myself.  What is surprising, although it should not be, is that being myself in a foreign environment is subtly different than being myself at home, and that, in and of itself is quite revealing. What is always surprising is that the highlights aren't the museum, or the adventure, but the little moments one was not expecting.  The chance encounters, the birds at your feet, the crow of a rooster.

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    Vacation, all I ever wanted….

     

    Well who knew?  Sometimes we go place for the wrong reasons.  Sometimes we go for the right reasons but with the wrong expectations.  Sometimes it all falls in place.  Sometimes it doesn't.  But if we are lucky something we needed is revealed. 

     

    Key West.  I will be back.  And this from a woman who usually avoids vacations to hot places.  

     

  • Make It Work

    Not sewing, yet, at least not from scratch.  Rather a down and dirty alteration wins the day.

     

    A trip to Key West had me in a bit of a tizzy the first few days of the new year wondering what on earth I would wear.  Most of my summer clothes are at least a size too big, more likely two to three sizes too big, but that was something I actually didn't discover until I tackled the alteration pile.

     

    Screen Shot 2022-01-09 at 8.00.38 AM

     

    Of course I had the top I altered to take to Tucson.  I thought perhaps I could alter the two dresses I made in the spring of 2020 (photo above). That is when I learned that I was not necessarily down one size, but at least two, and possibly three.  

     

    These two dresses saw heavy wear over two summers, and I knew that they were too loose, unwearable really, by fall.  But the reality hadn't really sunk into my head until I tried them on again with the intention of making alterations.  They fit beautifully when they were made, and I have to thank my friend Marjorie for all the fitting help, but that also meant that more than the most minor of alterations would be required, if alteration was even possible.   I decided to accept that they have served their purpose in my life, that they are still in good condition, and it is time for them to find a new home.

     

    Lafayette tank

     

    Enter a Lafayette 148NY tank I purchased 7 or 8 years ago. After trying it on I realized that although I needed to take up about six inches, this was actually manageable in this loosely fitted tank by simply taking up the side seams, and perhaps removing some extra volume at the center back seam as well.

     

    Alter2

     

    Initially my plan was detailed, to meticulously deconstruct and then replace all those beautifully finished seams.  But when I actually looked at the garment I realized the fabric was far too fragile for this to happen.  Seven season of wear have taken their toll, and although the top remains wearable, its time is limited. 

     

    This knowledge was freeing.  Since the alternative was the rag pile, there was no reason not to just slash and seam, and I did want one more wearable top for the trip.  Therefore,  I simply serged off the side seams, taking out four inches at the bust under the arms and tapering to nothing at the hem.  Notice that shaped hem in the top photo.  Taking significant volume out of the hem would require much more extensive work than the top was worth, especially at the side seams, where the curve is sharp, so a decided bell shape would be preserved.   I also took a big chunk out at the back waist, about 2 1/2 inches, tapering to nothing just above the bra line.  I had a little more leeway at the hips, and was able to remove a small amount of extra volume at the center back hem, but not much.  The trick was to take out enough to eliminate some of the bagginess, but not so much as to shift the side seams toward the back.  The serged edges were tacked neatly in place at the underarm and hem and I was done. Easy-peasy, and if it survived one trip I would be happy.  Everything else is just a bonus.

     

    Lafayette2

     

    Enter the obligatory hotel bathroom photo.

     

    The top works.  It is far from perfect, but it fits at least as well as anything I could buy and it fills an immediate gap.   As you can see the top remains loosely fitted through the body.  And it is also quite wrinkled here as this photo was taken about half way through the day, when I took my mid-day retreat from the sun.  If one cannot live with wrinkles, one should not wear linen.

     

    Perhaps all I needed was a bit of mad panic and a holiday out of the confines of familiarity and routine.  My brain is sparkling with ideas, and although I still have unpacking and cataloging to finish before extensive wardrobe sewing begins, I am looking forward to new sewing.  Somehow it has even dawned on my that even the idea that I have nothing, no patterns that fit, is itself an opportunity. It won't, perhaps be fast, but it will be fun.

     

    After all, how often does one get an opportunity to start over? 

  • And So The 2021 Reading List Closes

    One year of reading ends and another begins.  I am not going to list all the books I read in 2021 here, but I will include links to the previous monthly installments at the end of this post for those who just can't get enough.  This is the first year in many that I actually posted a reading list every month.  In fact, there may have been months when I believe that is all I posted.

     

    I read more books in 2021 than I did in 2020, and in both years I read far more than my yearly average over previous years.  I hadn't really thought about this very much until I sat on the fringes of a conversation regarding reading, where the others involved noted that they had in fact read less than usual since the Covid-19 pandemic began.  I noted, to myself, that I had read substantially more, but didn't jump in because the conversation was actually far more interesting without my input, which would have served no purpose other than bragging rights.  

     

    As for my own increased reading there were several factors involved.  To begin with, I had decided to read more in 2020, even before the pandemic shut-down began, and then, like many others, I went through a period of ennui where I was unable to read.  I overcame that however.  To some degree I simply. read more because I went out less; there were fewer social obligations to distract me.  I also have to admit that health issues may have contributed; it would be naive to deny this.  My television viewing also increased exponentially, and that I do blame on health struggles and lack of energy.  My heaviest television use occurred at those times of greatest listlessness.  

     

    I also cut back on social media in many ways.  One would think that in a time of greater social isolation, greater social media would enhance one's sense of connectivity.  But that was not what I found.  Yes, zoom was a godsend and I have friends I zoom with, and friends I talk with regularly.  But otherwise it seemed to me that I found social media sites polarizing.  Pandemic shut-downs were hard enough for everyone, but there were times that I felt that the combination of the news and social media, especially combined with a lack of one-on-one human interaction, were more isolating, and made conversations and interactions, if anything, more high-strung and volatile, as if none of us could completely get out of our heads.  Books helped me with this.

     

    At any rate, I have been happy to be a reader, and I still wish to see myself as a reader.  I have no regrets over any book I have read, no matter if it was difficult or mindlessly simple, no matter if I found myself agreeing with the author, or disagreeing vehemently.  Each and every book showed me some perspective on the world outside of my own, and often I was most surprised by the books I least expected to be surprised by. 

     

    Still my plan is to read less in 2022.  My goal is 60 books, and I would be very happy if that is all I read.  I will also be happy if I read more, or even less.  I have other things I want to do with my time, and although those things do involve social engagement, I also find I have no desire to be out in the world as much as I was prior to 2020.  In short it is all an adjustment.  Who knows where it will all lead.

     

    Note that already my reading was tapering off in December:  6 books, 5 of them fiction.  The one non-fiction book, Avrum Bluming's Estrogen Matters, was a reread.  I had read it the first time in April, so technically, although there are 140 books listed, that one was listed twice, for a total of 139 books.

     

    135. Edwige Danticat: Claire of the Sea Light.

    136. Alice Hoffman: The Marriage of Opposites.

    137. Joy Jordan-Lake:  Under a Gilded Moon.

    138. Avrum  Bluming: Estrogen Matters.

    139. Louise Penny: Still Life.

    140. Jean Stafford: Boston Adventure.

     

    Edwige Danticat's Claire of the Sea Light takes place in Haiti in the seaside village of Ville Rose.  The center of the novel is the occasion of Claire Limye Lanme's 7th birthday and in many ways the action of the book weaves its way around this center, much like a circular maze, using Claire's story to tell the story of the village, its history, its residents, as well as the story of Claire herself.  In the first part of the book we get a fairly straight-forward explication of Claire's story up until the time of this birthday, and Claire closes out the novel, making a decision about her own place in this intricately woven web.  In between these two points, the story moves forward, backward, and often sideways, showing us the interconnected lives that make up this place, and which make up the underlying foundation on which Claire's life is built.  It is a fascinating, and often poetically told story.  Despite the name of the novel, Claire is not the main character, she is simply a point of light around which all these other stories come into focus and are told.  It is a beautiful and compelling novel, although the story line is often convoluted and will frustrate the less than focused reader.    It is as much the story of a place as of a person, and in fact the story of each person is as much the story of the place and the people that shaped them.  Claire initially seems as much an idea, a creature of mist and yearning as she seems a child, just because of the way the story focuses around her but not on her.   As the stories weave together, the reader also begins to see how Claire will, herself, become interwoven into the story of this place, and this place will be interwoven into her own story.

     

    Alice Hoffman's The Marriage of Opposites also takes place in the Caribbean but it is an entirely different kind of novel, much more in the vein of classic historical fiction.  It is the story of Rachel Pomie Petit Pizarro, the mother of the painter Camille Pissarro, beginning with her childhood in the prosperous Jewish community in Saint Thomas and ending in France.  Hoffman paints a fascinating and occasionally maddening portrait of Rachel and through this rather good historical novel she also allows the reader to explore the precarious situation of women in early 19th century colonial life.  Rachel's stories, and her descriptions of Saint Thomas seem to flow from some of Pissarro's work.  I am certain this is intentional as Hoffman tries to weave together the little we know of Pissarro's family with what we do know of his work as an artist.  I found the story also fascinating because it explores the Jewish culture of St. Thomas, where there had been a strong sephardic Jewish community since 1700. Hoffman's description of the synagogue itself is particularly beautiful, blending a bit of magic with historical reality in the understanding and eyes of a child, the young Rachel. The telling drove me back down memory lane, allowing me to relive my own experience of visiting the synagogue of Congregation Beracha Veshalom Vegmiluth Hasadim in St Thomas, which is one of the oldest standing synagogue I have personally been to.  This one is the second oldest building built as a synagogue in the Untied states, having been built in 1832, and it is still in use. 

     

    From there, and continuing in the historical fiction vein, I read Joy Jordan Lake's Under a Gilded Moon, which concerns the Vanderbilts and the building of  the Biltmore Estate in nearby Asheville, North Carolina.  This was a book club choice, I believe partially chosen because it is about local, or at least regional history.  The novel shows the sharp dichotomy between the Vanderbilts, including their friends and kin, and their attitudes toward the poorer residents of the region. I felt it was particularly good at describing the beauty of the scenery. It suffered from attempting to add in too many "real people" and "real places", as if somehow it had to be a survey of all that was once here, at the expense of the story line.  It was clear a great deal of research went into the novel but the detail overwhelmed the story, resulting in inconsistently tenuous connections and gaps in the plot.  Still the novel did open a discussion into the roots of the divisions and attitudes, between rich and poor, attitudes that we still struggle with to this day.

     

    For my other book group, i reread Still Life, the first of Louise Penny's Inspector Gamache novels.  I enjoyed reading it the second time as much as I had the first, which makes me think I will enjoy it again and again, and it was good, from this perspective to see how many of the characters who might take center stage in later novels are introduced here.  

     

    Lastly I read Jean Stafford's early novel Boston Adventure, which proved to be a difficult choice.  The novel itself was good although at times tedious.  It is a carefully painted and studied portrait of Boston Society in the mid 20th century told from the perspective of an outsider, a poor girl, who is brought into the circle but who is never really a part of it.  In many ways it is a fascinating study of social isolation, perhaps not the best thing to read when our entire culture has been experimenting with a different vein of social isolation.  It is also a fascinating study of the cruelty that is often contained in social "kindnesses", in the way that persons of one class or milieu often, in the name of "helping", create effective prisons without explicitly meaning to do so. It was a worthwhile novel, but not perhaps the best airplane reading, where I would have done better with one (or four) short frivolous novels.

     

    Previous months:
    January, February, March, April, May, June, July1 and July2, August, September, October, November.